DBO Forums - Hey, I'm Fine. ...or not. https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/ Bungie.Org talks Destiny en Hey, I'm Fine. ...or not. (reply) Yeah, you've got a point there...I'll try not to go off the handle commenting on posts.
Then again Bungie annoys the hell out of me sometimes.

Honestly—as unfortunate as it is—this isn't a new circumstance. Dementia "runs" in the family. I put runs in quotations as Echo of course isn't blood related. However, this is the third family member in my lifetime to have been diagnosed. My great Aunt 'Papa' showed signs a while back. Because she had people who realized the signs and took the measures necessary, they got her treated and given the care and supplies she needs. As you can guess, there is no cure, but they've been exercising her brain and helping her every step of the way. In fact, she still remembers who I am, asks about me a lot.


Sadly,she keeps asking.

But in November and Echo's case, I feel frustrated too because NONE of us can do anything. He's not in his right mind, but he's still an adult so nobody can force him to do anything. And I do feel bad for Aunt November, I really do...but her way of dealing with this stress is NOT healthy...for any of us.

For example. About 2 weeks ago, November was begging Juliett(again, California) to come and help her find a facility for him. Juliett has a full-time career; November is retired. But she spends some vacation time and flies over. She spends about a week doing research, making sure he's taking care of and they find I think 3 separate places. November signs the papers for one (and I think she made a down payment too), and Juliett leaves. Her flight does not even land before November's calling mom saying they can't take him.

Then what the hell was all that research for!? Juliett is one of the smartest of the 6 siblings in that generation. I wasn't there for this stuff, but I KNOW for a FACT there's no way in hell she'd just pick a place at random and not get the information November needs. I also know that they went together, so this couldn't be possible.

But that's just what's gotten Mom (and myself) so angry—Juliett took more than a week off to help November get on track to helping Echo, and she derailed again in less than 5 hours.

And the memory loss situation is getting worse! Mom told me some time ago that Echo was caught walking around the house with a knife in his pocket because he wasn't sure if his kids "were intruders or not". That's dangerous.

But no one can force him into anything unless he does do something dangerous. And we do NOT need that to happen.

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https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170736 https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170736 Mon, 15 Jun 2020 22:45:41 +0000 DestinyMorpheus
It's No Bother. (reply) I figured it meant to be posted somewhere else...besides, you know Sonic always cheers me up, so this was actually making me feel better. So although the context was lost on me, I did get a smile. Thanks.

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https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170735 https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170735 Mon, 15 Jun 2020 22:01:39 +0000 DestinyMorpheus
*Double Take*... Oh!... oh... ._. (reply) So... uh. Hmmm. ...

Some how, and I'm not sure how, I attached my eh... summery comment here... on to the wrong comment. The context of this is on the rambling diatribe a post or two up in response to Robot Chickens observation above. To that end I have no more to say.

I make this post here now, as I read Robot Chickens latest post just now and went... "die'n uncle?! What!??" So... yeah. I'm not sure how I missed this, but regardless, Context is important and I wished to clarify. I apologize for the contextual error.

Oh, and... while I'm here, condolences.

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https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170688 https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170688 Sat, 13 Jun 2020 22:56:04 +0000 DestinyINSANEdrive
Hey, I'm Fine. ...or not. (reply) I'm sorry I didn't get back to you last night.

Thanks for sharing what you're going through. That is rough. It's awful how it is stripping away pieces of your uncle that you came to identify him by. It's awful how this puts pressure on your aunt and those idiosyncrasies (like conflict-avoidance) that were balanced by another personality have now spilled over into crises as her life swings out of balance. It's awful that your mother, in caring for her has reached a point of exhaustion and cannot tend to her own trauma. It's awful to watch people in your life stripped away of capacities you used to rely upon them having.

I wish we could get together over beers. If you want to talk more, let me know. If not, no worries. I'm sorry that things have gotten so heavy for you.

I'm going to drop the other part of our thread- suffice to say, I think there are more helpful ways to provide critique than LMFAO. :-)

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https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170687 https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170687 Sat, 13 Jun 2020 19:32:17 +0000 DestinyRobot Chickens
FYI: Blue Meth may be speed, but it won't make you Sonic. (reply) https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170685 https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170685 Sat, 13 Jun 2020 18:06:48 +0000 DestinyINSANEdrive Hey, I'm Fine. ...or not. (reply)

You seem to be pretty sensitive about stuff. You doing okay?

I mean, your response was not actually advice. It was just mocking. Pure and simple. Pretending you were trying to be helpful is... odd. Going on a diatribe about the state of the world and assuming people can't handle critique is... really odd.

Shoot man, it's not about whether or not we can critique each other. I mean, I was pretty blunt with you just now, so... maybe you just proved my point.

Seriously, you doing okay? We should do another D1 raid soon.

But...it wasn't mocking, though. It was the truth. And before anyone says "You don't know that", studying that particular clip, in this specific case it is true. None of the other Guardians had their Super active—save for the Dawnblade's Well, which any offensive Super wouldn't care about. From that close of a distance, the only class in the game that could stop SR's Mauls quickly was a Fist of Panic, which no one had or they would've used it on him. And considering most Maul explosions are big and strong enough to kill multiple Guardians in one hit, if Simpsons Rule did indeed move(or again, with honesty, even turned), he guaranteed would've gotten all four. Now in the original post I did say three swings or less. Would that have been guaranteed? No. Would it have been possible? If you click play and immediately pause, you'll see they're practically touching each other. Absolutely!

And I may have laughed, but I meant that statement with all honesty and sincerity. Getting overexcited can literally be the difference between a heartbreaking choke or the best clip of your career. I know because I've experienced it myself, and luckily I have two (very!) recent examples here:

These are two clips where I secured the last kills needed for our team's victory—clips in which we were both behind and I used a Super to win the game.

This first one is an example of how I got too excited and messed up further chances of success. I got a few kills with the Nova Bomb, it recharged almost immediately and instead of pacing myself, I immediately wound up and threw it too high like an idiot. So any further chances of getting a higher spree or more kills went out the window. Literally, it just floated up to the sky uselessly.

This one is where I stayed calm, bode my time and struck at the perfect opportunity. I breathed evenly and adapted to changes as they appeared. I died there, but it was a very well worthy sacrifice. ;-)

So yeah, I told him that because I know the feeling. I've been there too. And you can call it every mean name in the book, but that clip was textbook over-excitement, and that's a brief abbreviation of what I told him.

And honestly, I'm fine....but...not really, no. I've struggled for months about whether to post this or not because this is family business and could be considered private. But...watching her cry today...like, maybe 2 hours before I made that post, I don't even know who to turn to in a situation like this.


One of my uncles (for privacy's sake I'll just use the NATO) was one of the most famously skilled navigators in the family. Before there were iPhones and Google Maps, Uncle Echo knew his way everywhere. He'd almost always drive, and if someone else insisted and got lost, he'd drive them back on track all while hiding a boastful smirk. About a year ago, I first noticed signs of him getting lost. Not 'accidentally turning back the way you came out of the Chevron lost'. Completely missing for hours or even days lost. This had been going on for a while, but the first time I (and the rest of the family) learned of this was at our family reunion in New Orleans. At some point we had run out of napkins and Uncle Echo cheerfully volunteered to go to the store for more. He never came back. That was the last anyone had heard from him for a good 10 hours. When we finally got back in touch with him, he was all the way back at their house, in Houston, asking us where we were. He had no idea—none—that he went to get napkins and ended up leaving his wife, three of their adult children(and the wife of one of them) nearly 400 miles away with absolutely no way back home. My other Aunt Juliett(who by the way DROVE in from California) had to take all four of them BACK to the three different parts of the city of Houston in which they live(none of them live together except for the couple obviously) and check up on Echo. I went with them out of fear for her life because it was a total of more than 2,000 miles to drive in one day!

We get to his house? He's grinning ear to ear like we're joining him to watch the game. Again, not a clue.

This was my first time experiencing it, but I immediately knew it hit me so hard it ran me over.

Dementia.

And I didn't find out until much much later, this had been going on for at least a full year beforehand.

So this was in early 2019. It's only gotten worse and worse and worse. His wife, my aunt—and my mother's sister—is drifting aimlessly. She's still trying to hide this and pretend that everything is fine. She doesn't do anything to help Echo with this growing problem. In fact, she's actually been enabling him. It's as circular is a wash cycle: He goes blank and leaves the house for something short, he's gone for hours or days, ending up at his old job—in Katy or his sister's house...in Lafayette...either she or they convince him to turn back, he shows up days later, the family tells her to take the keys from him, she does, he asks for the keys and she gives them to him. It's gotten to the point where she had to buy and attach one of those Link things--whatever with the GPS--to track him whenever he runs away!

November constantly flocks to the nearest family member in the state—my mother. Calling her every. Single. Day.

Monday:"Echo's missing again, Golf...I need your help, what do I do? Do I call the police? Can you come help me find him?"
Tuesday:"Heeeey, guuuurll! What? Oh no, he's fine, he just came in this morning. It's a beautiful day out today, huh?"
Thursday: "I can't handle this, he's getting angry again Golf. Tell me what to do, I don't know what to do with him."
Thursday NIGHT: "Girl, we all had a blast at Applebee's! Delta got off work early tonight, so we had the whole family there!"

And so on.

Every single day, all hours of the day OR night. She wants everyone to do everything for her. The paperwork. The support groups. The facility research. If there is any sign of difficulty or aggression, November wants no part of it. Now, mom tells me that something very traumatizing happened to November in her childhood. I don't know the details, I obviously wasn't there—but November avoids conflict at all costs. Which is why she hands him the keys every time, knowing that's all kinds of dangerous to himself and others, and why she falls to pieces if anything is out of place. She even stayed at our house for two days, quote: "just to get away from him".

My uncle Echo needs serious help. This. man. is. sick.

He doesn't know.

His kids are powerless to help.

The only person who has the power to get him the support and care he needs is in complete and utter shutdown denial.

And the only living family member in the entire state is trapped under her thumb.

How can you tell someone that their brain is no longer functioning? How can you talk sense into a woman whose trauma of abuse has closed her off into a bubble that abuses everyone else? How do sit there and watch your mother boil over with frustration as her sister begs everyone for help only to ignore it and do whatever pleases her in the now?

I just don't know anymore.

So I guess that's a yes and no.

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https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170671 https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170671 Sat, 13 Jun 2020 03:45:19 +0000 DestinyMorpheus
... (reply) You seem to be pretty sensitive about stuff. You doing okay?

I mean, your response was not actually advice. It was just mocking. Pure and simple. Pretending you were trying to be helpful is... odd. Going on a diatribe about the state of the world and assuming people can't handle critique is... really odd.

Shoot man, it's not about whether or not we can critique each other. I mean, I was pretty blunt with you just now, so... maybe you just proved my point.

Seriously, you doing okay? We should do another D1 raid soon.

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https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170670 https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170670 Sat, 13 Jun 2020 00:26:17 +0000 DestinyRobot Chickens
That's The Saddest Thing I've Ever Seen. (reply) You seem to have made a mistake. My clip was absolutely perfect. I definitely didn’t blow my rocket launcher shot and waste it on a bunch of adds instead of the boss. Nope, I just don’t make those sorts of mistakes. (:

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https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170669 https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170669 Sat, 13 Jun 2020 00:08:48 +0000 DestinycheapLEY
That's The Saddest Thing I've Ever Seen. (reply)

Why would you say this? What purpose does it serve?


"Uh-oh, is that a post of constructive cri-diddly-iticism I hear?"

[image]

(Not even criticism, this is literally honest, helpful advice. Maybe a little playfully jabbed, but that's how tough love works)

Before I even get to SR's video—Holy. Shit. This is the saddest and most ridiculously outrageously irrational thing to happen; that we as human beings have gotten to the point where ANYTHING that isn't lavished drowning praise and overwhelming unanimous validation is pure evil and filth and wrong. How did we get to the generation where everyone gets a gold star simply for existing? I know from experience growing up that constant put-downs, abuse and insults* are terrible for a person's emotions, psyche and self-esteem.

That's not good for a community.

(or a community,as you put it.) *(not that there was any way in hell this is what that was)

But guess what?! I've got some bad news!: Cloying someone with near-worship levels of approval to the point where they think they can do no wrong is even worse. (and I swear to god, I want to link that picture of him so bad, but I'm not even dipping a toe into that cesspool)
You think advising someone on their mistake is being a jerk!?

(I censored it last time, but today THIS is the boot out of the womb some people need)

Jesus Christ on house arrest, that's depressing, that is absurd and that is soft.

Now onto the video itself.

He was excited. Maybe he wasn't posting about his epic skills, but was proud of a moment that turned the game around. That's how I saw it, and I enjoyed the drama of that moment.

I guess since you're thinking for him, you say he was excited, okay he got excited. And that's natural. Everyone does. Hell, I was excited when that clip first started, thinking "Oh man, they're ALL in a pile, he can exterminate the whole team in one fell swoop!"

Then he slammed, got one guy(on the second swing, btw) and then spent the entirety of the most powerful ability a Guardian could possibly have...spamming his attack on a murderous box.

Know what I was saying then?

"Noooo! What are you doing, move! THEY DON'T EVEN SEE YOU, MOOOOOOVE!!!"

And three seconds after that, another player(one that he quite literally let get away) easily kills him during his Super. Now I held my tongue and decided not to pick this apart. But apparently since giving people advice is being a jerk, I might as well go full on Hitler.

Killing another Guardian during their Super ability using methods other than another Super is considered an embarrassment. I didn't say that to him because it's still a fairly common occurrence(and also to spare his feelings).

So yeah, he's excited! I get it. We all get excited when an opportunity like that appears. But (and this is where the advice comes in) you can do one of two things with that excitement: You can spray your gun everywhere and hope you get one or two hits, or you can control it to your advantage, focus on what you're doing and hit every shot, then you can freak out and celebrate!

I'm guessing you've heard the joke/story of the bulls on the hill?

Two stud bulls are on the top of a large hill and they see dozens of cows scattered all the way down to the bottom. The young stud says "Hey! Let's run down there and fuck a cow!" And the older stud bull says "No, son—let's walk down and fuck them all."

SR had the advantage. He had the super. And most rare of all in a Gambit match, he had the entire team unaware of his presence. So that is double the element of surprise. If he moved even TWO steps to the left, this would've immediately went from a skin-of-his-ass luck to an Army of One clutch play.

Which finally brings me to another thing that I've now been forced to point out.

MAC ALREADY beat me to it because I was typing all this! And again, I wasn't going to say it because I was trying to avoid THIS. EXACT. SHIT. RIGHT. HERE.

That last part was me being a "jerk". This part is me being right.

Titan abilities already do the cheating for the player. Eight of their nine Supers track enemies. Virtually no skill is required. And I've personally seen Maul flames go around corners, so I'm going to revise my previous statement: SR could have turned two feet and still gotten all four kills.

You know what I think? I don't think he was excited. At least not, just excited. I think that he was literally expecting them to just walk up to his Super. I think he just went into a Mayhem mindset and just thought he'd camp there and wait for them to walk into it, and just got lucky that almost two of them did.

What I said was: You could've gotten all four quickly if you moved to them. (Advice)

What I could've said was: Good kills, but that was a wasted opportunity to really clinch the win. (Criticism)

Here's what my brain thinks when I see this kind of clip: This dude's playing a walking Action Pak of cheat codes and he blows his load in front of the whole team like an idiot? (Flaming)

If you seriously thought that was being a jerk, then it's no wonder.

Gosh, if I don't show perfect gameplay in a clip, maybe I shouldn't post anything at all or Morpheus will comment on that instead of paying attention to the point.

I guess this is the first non-perfect clip to ever be uploaded to this forum then.

Grow the hell up, dude.


POST EDIT: Just thought of this, so I'm adding it on.

You think I'm being a jerk by telling SR how he could improve? You think it's wrong to criticize people? Well, there's an easy solution for that: NOT CARING.

That comment wasn't directed at you—it was directed at him. It's his decision to what he does with that information. He could take it into consideration, he could just ignore it, or even better—he can tell me to go fuck myself. Simple as that.

He could be typing all that up right now. I read it, say okay, decide whether to reply or not, say I agree or disagree and bam. Who cares.

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https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170665 https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170665 Fri, 12 Jun 2020 22:49:41 +0000 DestinyMorpheus
Maybe don't be a jerk. (reply)

You could've gotten all four in three swings or less if you...y'know, moved. lmao


Why would you say this? What purpose does it serve?

He was excited. Maybe he wasn't posting about his epic skills, but was proud of a moment that turned the game around. That's how I saw it, and I enjoyed the drama of that moment.

Here's what my brain thinks when I see this kind of comment:

Gosh, if I don't show perfect gameplay in a clip, maybe I shouldn't post anything at all or Morpheus will comment on that instead of paying attention to the point.

That's not good for a community.

Also, I might add you don't need to really roam with that super as the hammer pulses track a fair amount now.

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https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170652 https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170652 Fri, 12 Jun 2020 18:02:00 +0000 DestinyMacAddictXIV
Maybe don't be a jerk. (reply)

You could've gotten all four in three swings or less if you...y'know, moved. lmao

Why would you say this? What purpose does it serve?

He was excited. Maybe he wasn't posting about his epic skills, but was proud of a moment that turned the game around. That's how I saw it, and I enjoyed the drama of that moment.

Here's what my brain thinks when I see this kind of comment:

Gosh, if I don't show perfect gameplay in a clip, maybe I shouldn't post anything at all or Morpheus will comment on that instead of paying attention to the point.

That's not good for a community.

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https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170651 https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170651 Fri, 12 Jun 2020 17:58:03 +0000 DestinyRobot Chickens
You Know That's A ROAMING Super, Right? XD (reply) You could've gotten all four in three swings or less if you...y'know, moved. lmao

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https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170647 https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170647 Fri, 12 Jun 2020 15:47:50 +0000 DestinyMorpheus
My Dirtiest Gambit Win (reply)

That's not dirty - that's fantastic. ;)

I've been on the losing end of an invasion like that - you're about to win, the invader shows up, and just enough damage is done that you can't quite finish the Primeval before the other team does. It's infuriating... but it's why some players insist on prioritizing invaders over finishing the boss. (Could have gone either way, if you ask me. That acolyte bubble that showed up at the end would have made me rage.)

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https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170641 https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170641 Thu, 11 Jun 2020 22:58:09 +0000 DestinyClaude Errera
Giant hammer FTW! (reply) https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170638 https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170638 Thu, 11 Jun 2020 19:40:37 +0000 DestinyMacAddictXIV My Dirtiest Gambit Win

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https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170633 https://destiny.bungie.org/forum/index.php?id=170633 Thu, 11 Jun 2020 18:20:35 +0000 DestinySimpsons Rule