Santa Claus DEAD! MURDERED BY TRAVELLER! (Destiny)

by bryan newman , Kentucky, Friday, December 13, 2013, 13:44 (4000 days ago) @ Ragashingo

Guardian News Headline: Santa and His Reindeer Dead. Killed by Traveller.

December 25th (Year Post Golden Age)

Santa and his Sleigh were shot down the Traveller's automated defenses last night as the deceased was making his Holiday rounds in the Last City. Eyewitness report that Santa Claus was attempting to find a chimney on the Traveller to gain access when he was shot from the sky. The Traveller (Age 37) had this to say:
"YO MAN! I was just Standin' my Ground! He was Tresspassin' on my Property...I know my rights! and the right to bear auto mated defense turrets is CLEARLY expressed in the space constitution."

Incidentally these are the first words spoken by the traveller since it's final stand against the Aliens that tried to kill us at the end of the Golden Age. Guardians have tried to take the Traveller into custody but have so far been unable to connect to Xbox Live Party and thus been unable to coordinate an attack.

Leaders of the various alien races and acquaintances of Santa have said this about dear St. Nick.

"To hell with that fat bitch! He gave me a lump of Coal! I wish I had been the one to do it! I would have ripped his scrawny two arms out of their sockets with my obviously superior four arms" - Fallen Supreme Commander of Genocidal Forces and Public Relations

"He gave me a can of motor oil last year. I'll never forget that." -Cabal President of Mars

"ARGRGRGRGRGRGGRGRGRGRHRHIWBWXVCVSVVQVXUANVNIRVDLHUFDBCWUIBEWBV" -Hive Hive Mind

"10100010001111001010101110101...2" -Vex Chief Robot

"JESUS WAS WHITE! SANTA WAS WHITE!"- Space Megyn Kelly

We reached out to the EXO for comment. They sent us a severed finger. Not sure what that means.

As this is a breaking news story we will keep you updated. For now lets tip our Santa Hats in memory of that amazing man that somehow had flying Reindeer and decided not to share that technology with us.